My translations from the meme below, hopefully with the idioms right:
The Theoretician. Marx, Engels, Trotsky, Gramsci — he’s read them all! For him, socialism is the only true system. Even though it has already failed in more than 40 countries… this time, it will work out for sure!
The Noble Revolutionary. From a well-heeled home, he never had to experience material poverty or budgeting. Dad paid his Antifa riot lawyer fees. Deems himself the vanguard of the working class. Has never worked.
The East German Retiree. Was overwhelmed with the changes after the fall of the Berlin Wall. His apartment is still as it was in the 1970s. Similar to West German pensioners who vote for Merkel’s party, he is impervious to reason.
The Cosplay Communist. Because he’s a dwarf, everyone should be a dwarf. Dreams of a world in which all people are equal – just like him. He scorns achievement because he is too pathetic to accomplish anything.
The Open-Borderette. Projects her self-hatred onto her own people. Her moral high-horse is compensation for the shortcomings of her personality. Her daddy-complexes are the driving force behind her political worldview: the yearning for a strong daddy-state.
The SJW. Introduces more rules of behavior, thinking, and language than an 18th century French etiquette manual. Wants free shit for everyone. Hates capitalism but would die without Apple, Twitter and Starbucks.
It’s not a complete list but it aptly identifies the types of people who aren’t monsters or particularly deviant; they’re ordinary folk who’d have been ignored as harmless eccentrics or peer-motivated toward healthier attitudes in a free system.
A similar list for Americans might be lighter on high-theory and heavier on social justice. I also once listed the qualities of an Eastern European anti-racist. But whatever the nationality or impulse of a leftist, they all serve the interests of global usury.